A Seed is Planted

As I started out on this adventure with my camera, I only had one thing in mind. Capture life. Real life, as it was happening and freeze it in the moment. I have always loved the photojournalistic style of photography and always admired black and white images. The first image I remember being captivated by was the Kiss in Time's Square. I wanted to know the story behind the image and the story intrigued me like it had so many others.

I have always loved telling a story. Ask my parents, they will tell you, I sometimes included so much detail the story was longer than the movie I was describing. I found photography a way to tell the story with very little words.

As my passion was being converted into a business, I got lots of well meaning advice. I took time and invested in education that pushed my photography to a whole new level. Yet in the middle of all of that I noticed I was trying to mold my business into someone else's vision. There was nothing wrong with their vision. In fact everything was right. Except that it just was not me.

I had dreams. I saw a vision of what my photography was to look like. I had fear. Just being honest, is that ok? I feel, so often we are trying to put our best professional foot forward, we lose the personal side. If I was honest, I didn't want to own a studio. I didn't want to shoot weddings. My passion was with kids and their parents. I wanted to capture the personality of the families I had the opportunity to shoot. I wanted to capture the glimpse a daughter gives only her father. Or the way a husband stands in awe of his wife as they look at their child for the very first time. I wanted to see those intimate moments that don't happen under the studio lights or being posed in the park. Hear me out. There is a place for posing and picture perfect images. I like capturing those moments also. But that is not where my passion is.

In 2006 I gave birth to our first son, Andrew. We call him Drew. I had an unplanned c-section due to pre-eclampsia. I was terrified and this wasn't our plan. I was worried they weren't going to let me take pictures. They allowed my husband to bring our camera in. They allowed him to take still images and we had a new camera that allowed for video capture so we got a couple of short video clips. I was awake for the c-section but heavily medicated. So later I remembered very little of those moments.  I CHERISH those images. They brought healing and realness to a moment that was so fuzzy in my brain. Here is my favorite image of that moment.

If not for this photograph I would never have known just how "Drew" He was from the minute he took his very first breaths.

These images planted a seed. A tiny, barely there seed. Photography can be healing. Images of life are powerful. The journey of birth, pain, fear, boldness, joy, tears, laughter, messy, and clean. All are worthy of being documented. This was the moment the seed was planted. It wouldn't be until 2011 That I would start to see a tiny green shoot pushing through the earth, toward the sunlight, and then not until this year 2013 that I would see the first bud forming. Yet here in this moment in 2006, the desire of photographing births was firmly planted.